Who is your “slap on the face” friend?

Do you have someone in your life, who will give you the truth about yourself,  (the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God! ) something that most people wouldn’t dare to do,  something that might seem like a hard slap on your face ? Think about it,  do you have such people in your life ?

Most of us are usually either too kind or too harsh on ourselves. We have reasons and excuses for our actions, why we did or dint do things a certain way, and have enough justification to  prove that our assumptions and beliefs about ourselves are RIGHT. Again, if those beliefs are left unquestioned or unchallenged, we would eventually build a mountain out of them &  create our life out of them.

Imagine living our lives based on JUST OUR beliefs or assumptions. I assume it would be mundane & routine with no outside stimuli and no room to growth or transformation. I also assume life would be hard, and it might seem like we are going in a loop. No thrill of leaping from the mountain and growing your wings on the way down.

I am sure we all have such people on our lives, people who we TRUST and believe in us, but we don’t give them the liberty or right to give us the “hard slap”. In fact  we don’t give anybody that liberty because we fear judgement and it feels our egos are squashed & identities are questioned. Our fear are quite valid, because we have people in our lives who are more than eager to tell us how we messed up and what we should have done instead. And more so people are generous in their advices because they believe it is their responsibility to do so.  Hence we  build a cocoon to protect ourselves from this. Our lack of trust in ourselves and their intent  then, makes us trash those ideas right away.

We need people in our lives, who love us deeply, who believe in  us and who can pull us up – and give it to us straight  (no sugar coating), when they notice that we are drifting, or not living our true potential.  People who can wake us from our dream world, give us a reality check, or push us to face what we avoid or hold us accountable. They  can say the harshest of things to us, which  might seem like a slap on the  face or a punch in the stomach, but with so much compassion that, it will force us to face the truth.

We might not enjoy taking this bitter sweet pill, and it would definitely feel like taking a hit, but it will get us to introspect and reflect to see the  2% truth behind what was told to us. And that is all we need . We don’t need people to change our minds and tell us what is right for us  – but we do sometimes need a jolt so that we can question ourselves as to why we do things the way we do.

Lets identify these people in our lives.  Who are they? Be courageous enough to be open to them, and what they have to say. Not get stuck on the words and think our identity is being attacked. Dig deeper and look hard for the truth behind it. You might or might not identify with it. Remember, it is not judgement, it is feedback, sometimes STRONG feedback but with utmost love and compassion. Build that muscle! Play BIG !

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Marianne Williamson